I was listening to old songs the other day and one of them, performed by BGa, had the following words: “God, I am Yours, no one else’s. There is nobody here except You. Let them take whatever they want; I just want to be with You, where there is Light”b. And hardly anybody knows for sure the location of the place where one can find this Light. Maybe it is in paradise and BG would not mind going there? Or else, maybe it is some kind of a Divine chamber, sort of a reception office of God, where He meets the most gifted and where the surroundings are flooded with Light? Interpretation on the subject varies among individuals perceiving with spiritual eyes and there is no consensus. Where there is God, there is, in fact, Light—and why is that? Just because.
Clearly, like everybody else, BG seeks not Light but a certain internal state which one experiences when affected by Light. Even a relatively thick-skinned person feels somewhat elevated when placed in Light, let alone highly sensitive individuals who experience a soaring feeling and shift into a state of extraordinary clarity and tranquility of the mind. Unhinging of the mind cannot exist in the presence of Light, therefore common negative reactions of the mind temporarily go away—but only for as long as you stay within the area of Light—once you leave it, the internal darkness of clouded mind comes back.
Back in the day, BG used to sing “it is possible to be very close, but never closer than your skin”, and Light from the outside is unable to fill up your internal space entirely—it just won’t go deep enough. It is possible to live on borrowed Light, but such life is akin to living with acute kidney failure—a lifetime bound to hemodialysis that helps remove toxins and excess fluids from your body. Having said that, anyone who is interested is capable of gaining Light within the self, provided they do their very best. We are unable to generate Light by ourselves, nor can we have ourselves charged with Light from an external source permanently. But we can help our Consciousness reach its full potential and annihilate our internal darkness. And for our Consciousness to be revealed fully, we need to practice self-awareness, as this is the only practice that works. Certainly, one’s Consciousness can be revealed in instances when one is exposed to the impulse of Mercy of God and then becomes spontaneously enlightened but such things are much rarer than wannabe enlightened try to make us believe on YouTube. The practice of self-awareness gives us a real chance for growing our internal Light; even a slight growth of self-awareness in daily life increases internal Light. When you reach full self-awareness, then all possible internal Light henceforth becomes yours.
Getting access to Light is not the only reason why people seek proximity to God. Getting Light is a nice bonus, a cherry on the cake. Light balances out the dark of unconsciousness whereas the Presence of God satiates your thirst like nothing else in this world. People pursue Light for the sake of compensation. Those striving to erase the feeling of being a misfit and alienated in this world, seek proximity to the Creator. On the Path leading to this proximity, one gains Light and many other things, as well as undergoes a series of changes; although, those who never knew such thirst don’t really need this proximity. There is not much they have to tell God but may continue taking from Him bit by bit while keeping Him at bay, as close proximity can be dangerous, you know: there is a risk of losing individual sovereignty. And here, as our wise BG said, “It’s better to keep some distance if you value your life”. It is possible for one to disappear in God, but not to burn up in Light. Light can burn down your internal matter but cannot alter the mind's structures. If you want to save yourself—pursue Light. If you want to transcend the boundaries of everything you have ever known—seek proximity with God.
Or else, simply enjoy good songs without delving too much into the meaning of the lyrics.
aBoris B. Grebenshchikov, a Russian rock musician, frequently referred to as BG after his initials.
bLines of the lyric from the song ”Promised Day” by Boris Grebenshchikov.